Maths Jokes!

Talking sheepdog gets all the sheep in the pen for his farmer. He comes back and says ‘All 40 accounted for.’ Farmer says, ‘I’ve only got 36!’ Sheepdog replies, ‘I know, but I rounded them up.'

Hired an odd-job man to do 8 jobs for me. When I got back, he'd only done jobs 1,3,5, and 7
 
Have you heard about the mathematical plant? It has square roots
 
After careful investigation, it was found that aliens' heights were paranormally distributed
 
I hit someone with a scientific calculator - I used the cosh button
 
What kind of tree could a maths teacher climb? = Geometry
 
What do you get if you cross a maths teacher and a clock? Arithma-ticks!
 
Last night I dreamed that I was weightless! I was like, 0mg